Frigid? Ugly? Boring? A plant?
These were the responses I got when I tossed out, "So, hey,
what do you think an asexual is?" (Alright, so my friends aren't
too smart.)
There's a lot more to asexuality that being "frigid", and
it's not just for single celled organisms. Asexuality is something
seldom heard and rarely discussed. AVEN (The
Asexuality Visibility and Education Network) describes
asexuality simply as a person who does not experience sexual
attraction (they also point out that this does not necessarily mean a
lack of sex drive, just a lack of attraction). It's not impossible.
So, if a person experiences little to no sexual attraction, where
do they fit in on the sexuality scale? At one end is homosexuality, at
the other, heterosexuality, with bisexuality, transgender
homo/bi/heterosexuality and anything else falling in between...but
where do asexuals go?
First of all, sexuality is so fluid that a scale simply won't work.
People that start out in life considering themselves heterosexual may
eventually recognize that they are bisexual or homosexual. People may
flow from one sexuality or sexual preference to another--or even none
at all. Asexuality may just be another path for some people to follow.
There is nothing wrong with asexuality, although asexuality is
sometimes a result of sexual desire disorder. The Intimacy Institute
defines sexual desire disorder as "...a persistent absence of
sexual fantasies or desire for engaging in sex. Further, the
individual exhibits an intense aversion to either heterosexual or
homosexual genital sexual contact...Intensive desire disorders,
however, may reflect complicated psychological problems that are
difficult to treat. In addition, some individuals may be biologically
incapable of sexual interest or involvement in sexual activity and,
although members of a sexual species, are themselves asexual."
For some people, asexuality is a choice. It may originally start as
celibacy due to personal or religious reasons, and evolve into a
desire not to enter into a sexual relationship. Some people feel that
sex is overrated, and that relationships are deeper and more
meaningful without an underlying desire for sexual contact.
Whether it’s biological, emotional, or a personal decision,
asexuality is too often overlooked. It encompasses so much more than
being “frigid”, and should be recognized as such. Considering how
many relationships are based solely on sex, or how many friendships
are ruined because of sex, I really can’t see the harm in
asexuality.
Stop by my Asexuality
Links page for more information about asexuality and
asexuals.
Source by K. Hayes, October 21, 2001 - Suite101.com
©2001
